Spiteful Valentine
by Dusky
Summary: Spite found Valentines Day to be sickening and pointless. She doesn't understand the concept of love....but maybe she will change her mind. Valentines Day request. EnvyXOC. Don't like, don't read.


This is a Valentines Day one-shot requested by FMAdiclonius from Deviantart =)

I intended to have this done by Valentines day but I ended up getting sick and had zero motivation to work on ANYTHING DX

So here it is ^^

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or any of it's characters...but you probably knew that XD

* * *

"Awwww Deceit, these flowers are beautiful! Thank you!"

Spite grimaced as Vanity giggled at the blue haired homunculus. She held a bouquet of assorted flowers in her arms.

Deceit grinned and rubbed the back of his head. "No problem, I'm glad you like them." He replied with a blush.

Spite tried to hold in a gag of disgust. Why were they acting so lovey dovey anyway? Oh right....it was Valentines Day. Lust had told her about it the day before. Apparently it was a day when humans showed they loved each other by giving gifts comprised mainly of candies and flowers or some other crap like that. Spite found it all to be sickening and rather pointless.

"Would you two give it a rest already? Your going to make me sick." She growled as she walked over to the other two homunculi.

"Awww why do you have to be such a grump?" Vanity pouted.

Spite rolled her eyes. "Why are YOU celebrating this....annoying human holiday?" She countered.

"I think it's a cute holiday!" Vanity defended. "It gives me such a warm and fuzzy feeling." She added dreamily.

This time Spite did not bother holding in the gag that rose in her throat. "And NOW I am sick...thanks a lot..."

Vanity gave Spite a quizzical look. "Your a homunculus....homunculi don't get sick, silly."

"Wanna bet?" Spite muttered.

"You know what I think? I think Sunshine is just sore cause SHE doesn't have someone to spend Valentines Day with." Deceit suggested as he casually slung an arm over Spite's shoulder. He let out a pitiful squeak as Spite twisted his arm against his back.

"What in the name of all that is holy...would make you think that I would actually WANT to celebrate this disgusting holiday?" She hissed menacingly.

"She's right! Sunshine isn't the type to wanna celebrate a holiday like this!" Greed declared as he entered the room. "Besides...she has a certain palm tree to spend it with." He added with a smirk.

Spite shoved Deceit to the floor before whirling around to face the older homunculus. "Do you WANT to die?" She hissed icily.

Greed gulped as he held his hands up and backed away from her slowly. "N-no, I'm good...it was just a joke...no need to take it personally."

Spite gave him one of her infamous glares before pushing past him. "Well...it wasn't funny..."

---

Emerald eyes scanned the city with cold disinterest. The dark girl snorted as she watched couples gush over each other. _"How sickening...."_

Spite sighed as she walked down the streets, glaring at all of the heart shaped decorations that filled the windows of virtually every shop. She had planned on visiting the city to avoid Vanity and Deceit's mushiness and Greed's teasing, but she was beginning to think she had been better off with them. _"I think the humans are taking this holiday way too far..."_

Her thoughts were interrupted as she bumped into someone. When she looked up she was met with amethyst eyes. "....Sensei...."

Envy gave her an amused smirk as he arched an eyebrow at her. "I don't know whether to scold you for being in the city without telling me....or for not paying attention to your surroundings." He said playfully. He decided against being angry with her for coming to the city without his permission as he did not feel like getting into another fight with her.

Spite rolled her eyes before proceeding to walk past him.

"Hey! Don't ignore me!" Envy whined childishly as he followed her.

The two homunculi walked side by side, the older one occasionally glancing down at the younger one.

"So what are you doing here anyway?" Envy finally asked.

"Avoiding Vanity and Deceit....they are acting all mushy...." Spite muttered.

Envy grimaced. "Ya....I saw that too."

They continued to walk silently as Spite scowled at all of the couples. Envy merely stared straight ahead, ignoring the antics of the humans, they disgusted him but he had grown used to it over the years.

"Sensei...." Spite murmured.

"Hm?" Envy replied as he glanced over at her.

"Why do humans celebrate such pointless holidays?" She asked.

Envy shrugged. "Who knows....humans are weird..."

Spite glared at a passing couple. "I don't see the point in gushing over someone like that...it's a waste of time and it will most likely never last."

Envy smirked at her. "What about you...don't you have someone you would gush over?"

Spite made a face. "As if..." She scoffed.

"Awwww not even me?" Envy suggested playfully.

"That will be the day when hell freezes over." Spite deadpanned."Greed would be a better choice then you." She added coldly.

Envy flinched and resisted the urge to hit her. That had hurt.

"Ok...I'm outta here..." Spite muttered when she finally had enough of all the lovey doveyness of the city. She sprinted in the direction of the forest that Dante's mansion was located, leaving Envy behind.

The homunculus scowled as he stared at the ground. "Greed would be a better choice, huh?" He muttered to himself as he kicked a rock. "We will see about that..."

----

Spite sighed as she leaned against the tree trunk. She did not want to stay in the city but she also did not want to go back to the mansion, so she had chosen to pass the time by just hanging around in the forest. The dark girl sat comfortably on the tree branch and watched a group of birds that were fluttering about. She noticed that they gradually separated from the group in pairs.

Spite crinkled her nose. _"Even the animals are being mushy..." _

She closed her eyes and tried to drown out the sounds of happy chirping by thinking about other things. Things that had nothing to do with Valentine's Day, or candy and flowers, and most certainly, absolutely nothing to do with a certain palm tree-like homunculis.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she felt the tree branch bend from extra weight and sensed someone crouching in front of her. _"Speak of the devil...."_

Spite opened her eyes and was surprised to see a red rose being held out to her.

Envy's face was expressionless as he waited for her to react.

"Wh-whats this?" Spite asked in confusion.

Envy rolled his eyes and smirked at her. "It's a rose...what's it look like, stupid?"

Spite glared at him. "I know what it is!" She snapped. "But what is it for?"

Was she that clueless? _"Didn't think she was the dense type..."_ Envy thought to himself.

"It's for you...so what do ya say, Ice Queen....be my Valentine?" He asked with a playful smirk as he held the rose closer to her face.

Spite's cheeks burned as they turned various shades of pink. She mutely reached out and took the rose, staring at it with a look of confusion before she finally regained her composure.

She looked up at Envy and arched an eyebrow at him. "Really, Sensei? A rose? I didn't think you were into these cliches....and I thought we both agreed that we hated this mushy stuff?"

Envy shrugged. "Can't blame a guy for trying...I'm not very creative when it comes to this stuff and a rose was all I could come up with...I had to do SOMETHING....I refuse to accept that you would actually pick Greed over me."

Spite rolled her eyes. "You DO realize that I wasn't serious about that, right? I would sooner give Pride a hug before admitting that Greed is even the SLIGHTEST bit charming."

Envy broke into a fit of laughter upon hearing this.

Spite smirked as she twirled the rose in her fingers. "Just....don't expect me to gush over you."

"I would prefer you didn't...I don't want you turning into another Vanity." Envy replied.

"Perish the thought..." Spite shuddered at the thought of her acting like her pink haired friend.

She looked over at Envy, who was sitting on the tree branch, his eyes closed and his head leaned back. The girl bit her lip before leaning towards him and pressing her lips softly against his cheek.

Envy's eyes snapped open when he realized what she was doing. He was beyond shocked, Spite, the most hateful girl he had ever known, was kissing him. He was so shocked...that he fell off the tree branch.

He groaned as he lay on the ground, still too surprised to even bother getting up.

Spite leaped off of the branch and gracefully landed a few feet away from him. She walked over and placed her hands behind her back, leaning over to look at him with an amused expression.

"Happy Valentines Day, Sensei."

------------------------End--------------------------------------------------------

Romance is not my forte so please forgive me if this sucks XD;;

I tried my best though :3


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